Papa y Mama

The mystery was over. After nine months of rolling our mind through various possibilities of what this Eddie/Emi mix will look like, suddenly those dark sparkling eyes and long black hair filled our vision. And, our hearts. This is our son. The Lord has granted us the profound responsibility of this heart, this life, to care for. We will trust the Lord's sovereignty and release him back to the Lord's, but as stewards of this child we will do our best to lead him into a life of awareness of the Lord and his grace.

I remember the first moments. I had just experienced the most incredible, inexplicable feeling of him emerging from within, and suddenly this tiny face and slimy body was laid on my chest, on his side, arms flailing. He had not begun to breath yet and his lips were pursed. His tiny fingers were spread apart from one another, and his legs were stiff... but he still just melted onto me, he fit there within my arms. The nurses were roughing him up to introduce his lungs to the earth's oxygen, but all faded to me as my eyes locked in so steadily with this infant's. His gaze was so strong, his neck craned and his dark eyes did not move from a steady stare. It took my breath away. I always thought that I would have a thousand emotions coursing through me, with a stream of thoughts, whenever I saw my child for the first time. I had requested they lay him on my chest beforehand, and I had imagined this moments a hundred times in the weeks leading up to this experience. Yet now, it was simply AWE. Not a million emotions like cobwebs in a ball, but just one. One emotion that filled me. AWE at what the Lord had created through us. I  could not be more thankful.

After they had taken him away to be cleaned, Eddie took the freshly swaddled baby into his arms. I watched him from my place on the bed, as he was profoundly gentle, and with the great well of emotions conspicuous by the tears on his face. He was a father, now. I will never know what he was thinking... he made his way to the corner of the room, with his back to everyone. I had passed onto him the role of naming the child... I think there is something significant in fathers naming their sons. He was there for a long time, as it seemed to me. Soon after he turned around he had the most incredible rich expression on his face, and also one of anticipation as he was waiting to tell me what he had decided. Everyone else was ushered out by him and he leaned over the bed so that I could still take in who this, our child, was. He told me three different names but then said that he was, " Uriah Daniel." We both knew! The previous week, that had been the name that was implanted in my heart during prayer times, and it had a coinciding vision of who we were to pray that he would be. The Lord didn't need to also affirm that name in my heart, but he did. And... Uriah Daniel he is!